A Planner Plans: The Good Life

Oh blog, how I've missed thee. I can't believe it's been over a month since my last confession.

I took a short hiatus from the blog to really buckle down and concentrate on life as a Bride and not just a planner. The truth is, during the majority of the year, I spent more time being a planner, than a bride. I wanted to make sure I didn't blink and miss the moments that count.

I have so much to catch up on and lots to share both from our wedding and those of my gorgeous 2010 couples. In the meantime I leave you with one sneak peak from our awesome videographers (yes, you read that correctly videographers) at Illumimoto Cinema and a heartfelt, Happy New Year!

A Planner plans: Words of Wisdom

As the wedding date approaches Mr. Charming and I have received an ASTRONOMICAL amount of advice. Mostly unsolicited.

We always take notes.

What I've learned over the course of our engagement, and courtship in general, is that your relationship is what you make it. There's no road map to the "perfect" marriage because in my eyes it just doesn't exist. If it does, it's usually just on the surface. The reality is, when you join two lives, there will be differences of opinions and approach, it's what will typically strengthen your relationship over time.

During our last counseling session, our Reverend gave us some real words of wisdom. When you love someone, don't love them to "death". Love them to life. Enjoy the life that you build with them, cherish their existence, pray for their well being more than your own, worship with them and recognize that your time on this earth is not promised.

Mr. Charming and I have had an interesting relationship. Not perfect by any means but the imperfection is what makes him truly charming. You see, I'm marrying the person who makes me feel everyday like I want to be better. For him, myself and my family. The one person who sees beyond the "surface", walks this walk of reality with me everyday and loves me, regardless.

The best advice I've heard so far...Marriage is a constant verb.

21.

A Planner Plans: The dress

I'm not one for superstition. Mr. Charming and I are seeing each other the night before. We're are seeing either other prior to the ceremony. He has seen my dress. Although I actually wanted him to come with me on the shopping trip, he didn't because it's where he drew the line. He would like some element of surprise and I'm ok with that.

But traditional I pretty much am not.

The hunt for the perfect dress was a short one. In fact, it took about 10% of the effort it took to find my shoes.

My first stop on the journey was Country Way Bridals in Haddonfield, NJ. The ladies over there are fabulous and it was where I ultimately selected my bridesmaid dresses. It was there that I met my first love:


Melissa Sweet Mila (Source www.preownedweddingdresses.com)

I adored her from afar for days. I contemplated the purchase mainly due to budget. Although pricewise she was within my dress budget, logically, I just couldn't wrap my head around the cost of the dress. Something I'd only be wearing for 10 hours of my life. (Says the women with $835 shoes). A little crazy? Maybe. But I couldn't, so I moved on.

The next stops were pretty much all of the local bridal salons within a 30 mile radius and a few on a random trip to New York. Verdict? Ehh.

I found myself running into the same problem. The dreaded bridal sample gown.

A few things never worked in my favor. #1 Height. I'm a little under 5' 2". There is no podium in the world that will make me look like anything other than swallowed in a dress made for someone seven inches taller.

#2. Well endowed. I have a fairly petite frame, but am quite generously endowed in areas. The bottom half of my bottom is comfortable in an 8. If I was interested in seeing how half of the dress looked, I would have struck gold.

#3. Lack of imagination. I'm just not one for imagining how a dress is going to look. I need to actually SEE it to get the feel.

----I wanted to take a minute to let you in on something I forgot to mention at the beginning of the post. I went shopping by myslef. GASP. I know---

After about two weeks time, one Saturday I ventured into Kay Bridal in Maple Shade, NJ. I've passed the salon a million times as it's off of a major highway I frequent. That day I figured, what the heck and went in.

I had an amazing experience. First, there was no rushing. There were many brides there but my saleswoman took great care of me. Two, they had the dress that met all of my requirements:

One shoulder, comfortable, affordable, sophisticated yet not over embellished. Oh...and buttons. I am a sucker for a wedding gown that buttons down the back.

When we entered the fitting room, the consultant took one look at the gown and said-that one is yours. She encouraged me to try on the others that we had already grabbed but reiterated, it's this one. She was right.

So, without further ado, internet meet my Maggie. Fiorella is what I call her.





Source (Recycled Bride)

A Planner Plans: Decor-Um

Blue, purple, ivory, chocolate, gold. Those are the colors of my wedding.

Gasp. I know.

From the very beginning of our planning stages, I knew if there was one area i'd be knee deep into, it was the decor. I love decor. I love details. I love design. So when we started down this road I knew that there would be many times when I'd have to walk myself away from the ledge, aka, world of wedding blogs, and design our wedding, very much like we design for our POSH Touches package.

First step up: choosing my colors. I've often told my brides to "forget that it's a wedding", dumped a ton of swatches on the desk in the studio and told them to pick their favorites. That's pretty much what we did.

Blue. Blue is our favorite color. I knew that blue would be making an appearance in the wedding. Minimally though, more of an accent. Blue represents fluidity. Here is our blue:





Eggplant. I love the richness of this hue of purple. Deep, royal, sexy. As I began my linen selection, I fell in love with a purple Velvet linen. VEL.VET.



Chocolate. Along the lines of the eggplant. Sexy & silky.



Ivory. Bold. I love the look of an all ivory event. Alas, this was not going to work for our reception. Ceremony? Possibly.







I know it sounds a little crazy but in the little land in my head, it works. I envision a space filled with richness, with a sexy, silky, royal, bold vibe.

Gold. Regal. Everyone needs an accent color right?



Color can truly dictate the feel of an even. With a combination of fluidity, richness, sexy, silky, bold, regality and warmth, I think we will be ok. Can't wait to see how it all comes together, 42 days to go

A Planner Plans: Food Glorious Food

Ahhh our wedding menu. By far the most anticipated portion of the reception for me.

In an effort to keep our wedding feeling totally authentic, Mr. Charming and I decided to forgo the typical wedding menu (GASP, I know) in pursuit of something a little more us. You see, after so many years in the industry, the thought of another filet, tilapia or chicken with white sauce makes me literally ill. I knew personally, this was not a route that we would travel.

Though our venue offers a wide variety of options when it came down to it, nothing appealed to us. Seriously. NOT.A.THING. So, after thinking about it we came to the conclusion that our wedding dinner will be....

*Drumroll please*

Brunch!

Mr. Charming is a meat and potatoes kind of guy, I'm a sea lover, he's allergic to seafood and the thought of a juicy peace of steak is not as appealing post wedding dress diet. Our compromise was to throw it all out the window and have what we really love...breakfast. After all, if you get married on new year's eve, you kind of can get away with almost anything...Right?

We're calling it our "Almost midnight brunch".

When we announced it to the venue, they were beyond thrilled and created a menu that causes my mouth to water all of these months later. In 52 days our guests will be introduced to our idea of a perfect end to the year:

Breakfast Croissants-Scrambled Eggs on a Croissant with Shaved Grilled Ham
And Havarti Cheese

Grits Station (Homemade grits served with bacon bits, pop-corn shrimp, shredded cheddar and mozzarella, tomatoes, peppers and onions)

Omelet Station (With a Selection of Meats, Cheeses and Vegetables)

French Toast & Waffle Station (Waffles & Cinnamon Raisin Brioche French Toast, Chocolate French Toast, Whole grain toast served with Fresh Fruit, Vermont Maple Syrup, berry compote, bananas foster, roasted apples, chocolate shaving and Whipped Cream )

Fresh Fruit display

And for those guests who actually want dinner, we will have a carving station complete with carved beef and salmon with roasted asparagus and tomatoes as well as a pasta station with a variety of pasta options.

Our guests will also enjoy passed mimosas throughout the night as well as our signature drink (in addition to the open bar).

Pretty sick menu. If I must say so myself.

A Planner plans: Keeping up with the Joneses

...and the Petries and the Williams'.

One would think that being a professional wedding planner, planning your own wedding would be a breeze. NOT.

The thorn in my side as of late has been the guestlist. Having watched many of my clients go through the struggle of keeping up with invitations and addresses and herds of people, I figured I'd be proactive and send out an email shortly after getting my little sparkly requesting addresses.

Slight problem.

That was about a year ago and apparently for many of my guests, many changes have occurred over the last year. Atleast 10% of our invitations now require replacement addresses (yay for the booming economy and the successes of house hunting) and though I am thrilled with all of the new locations we'll have to visit post wedding, for the purpose of invitations this is not a good thing.

Lucky for me, we have two of the most amazing vendors on our team LeTrice of LePenn Designs and Kathleen Turnure of Elegant Hand Calligraphy for all Occasions. These two ladies are two of the most patient women I've ever met. I've been fortunate enough to correspond electronically with both over the planning process, especially LeTrice. Over the last few months we have exchanged hundreds of emails regarding changes to our stationary and most recently the need for additional....everything.

As we prepare for invitations to hit the stands (smile) tomorrow, I've learned a valuable lesson. One last reminder to your guests to inform them if their addresses have changed, will not hurt. Lucky for us, LeTrice sent extra blank envelopes and Kathleen was prepared to step into action when we needed more.

Awesome right?

And because I just couldn't stand to wait for another post....here's a sneak peak of what our guests will be seeing in their mail very soon...




Happy Friday!

A Planner Plans: Sweets for my sweet

Confession time. I am OVER wedding cake. Seriously over it.

I think after a certain number of years of exposure, just like anything, the novelty wears off. For me, that is the story of me and cake. I can't stand it. I can appreciate it, but give me a Viennese table full of brownies, cookies and pies and my heart is content.

So when it came to the great dessert debate, I realized Mr. Charming and I had a huge difference of opinion. Mr. Charming loves cake. Not just any cake but chocolate and not your average chocolate but roll over with your stomach cramping for ganache overdose chocolate. For him there was no other option.

I however, dreamed of s'mores. Roasting marshmallows, graham crackers and a bite sized morsel of chocolate along with a variety of cheesecakes.

Insert problem.

We arranged for our venue to offer s'mores but after months of consideration, decided it was just too messy.

So it was back to square one. Since I was obviously losing the battle on cake, I compromised and agreed to a small cake. 2 tiers, nice and simple, or so I thought.

I contacted Jen of Hudson Cakery soon after agreeing to serving cake at the wedding. Jennifer and I worked together on Bethany & Chris' wedding and I really just adored her. When we started developing options for the cake, she made it very well known, the possibilities were endless. Cake soon became yet another thing on the ever growing to do list.

This past week, Jen made a house call and brought with her what I affectionately refer to as sin on a spoon. Seriously. For tasting purposes, we were given a chocolate cake with oreo filling, chocolate chip cake with chocolate filling and an almond cake with vanilla filling, all with vanilla buttercream frosting.

I.DIE.

I seriously sat grinning ear to ear and confessed that I was totally wrong. Not only did we HAVE to have cake, we had to have lots of cake.

Our final selections, chocolate cake with a layer of chocolate and a layer of peanut butter and almond cake with a layer of cherries and a layer of crushed almonds. Add to that a variety of cake balls including cheesecake, red velvet cake, carrot cake with cream cheese icing and s'mores cake, and you have yourself a very happy Mr. Charming and #Giddyplannerbride.

This is Jennifer.


Samples of each cake. Are these not huge?


Cake pops (melted a bit in transition but delicious nonetheless)



I was wrong and I'm glad I was. Not only am I now looking forward to the cake, I'm now practicing a serious amount of restraint to not eat the entire sample. They were huge. In a good way!

77...

A Planner Plans: Cold Feet

Selecting my dress was easy. Way to easy. I went dress shopping by myself, narrowed it down to three options and then returned to the two salons with my mother, future mother in law and my maid of honor and anxiously waited for their approval. Easy breezy.

What was not so easy was what I would wear on my feet. I searched for months for the perfect shoes. Yes, months. I went to the Nordstrom near me so many times, I started making friends with the workers. I must've tried on every stiletto within a 20 mile radius that I could find in a shade of blue. You see, if I knew nothing else, I knew that my something "blue" would be on my feet.

After exhausting all possibilities both locally and on the web, I eventually gave up. Mr. Charming and the rest of the world would just have to accept that I was defeated by the possibility of shoes that only lived in my dreams. That was until I saw these:



Uggs Bailey Button Deep Cobolt Blue. I DIE.

You see, second to my obsession with jeans, runs my obsession with Uggs. I love my Uggs. Wear them as much as I can all year round. Yes, I'm one of those people. I love how comfy they feel, how warm I stay and I feel they are just the perfect compliment to a pair of skinny jeans or a cute winter dress. When I saw these in Nordstrom I took a double take.

Could I get away with Uggs under my formal gown? Would everyone think I was insane?

I decided to keep looking but something in me always brought me back to that same place. One day, I took Mr. Charming to the mall and asked his opinion. In typical Charming fashion he said "Who cares what other people say. You like them, I like them on you and it's about us." Just like that, I was $199 poorer.

Since my purchase I haven't exactly received a ton of support on my Uggs decision. My mother actually begged me not to wear them so much to the point that I picked up these beauties, as a backup:



BC Footwear women's bicycle built for two flat.

Though they are cute, something about them just doesn't feel "genuine" to me. Even with the replacements in hand, I still think back to my Uggs tucked under my gown, keeping me cozy and offering a little since of normalcy on an otherwise intense day.

I haven't actually decided which pair will make their debut on the big day. I will probably need until then to decide.

Did you have any small things drive you absolutely nutty during the planning process?

A Planner Plans: Green Eyed Monsters

We were unable to post on Friday because we were coordinating the wedding of our amazing couple Joan & Vincent. Now that their wedding is complete and they are luxuriating on the beach in Mexico, we are a bit back to normal (until this weekend's three weddings).

I've hesitated to right this post. Everything in social media tells you to remain positive, not to focus on negative, not to "bash" vendors or downplay products. The reality is however, people sometimes suck.

Yesterday I cried.

I consider myself a strong person. My greatest accomplishment, next to Chris, is never settling for no. I graduated with an MBA because someone challenged me to. I dual majored the summer before my Senior year to see if I could. At 23, I purchased my first home and seven years ago started this business which I love. I pride myself on being strong and yet I cried.

Hard tears.

I've told myself a million times not to let the planning get to me. Our wedding planning has taken a bit of a back seat as my priority and focus is assisting my clients. Mr. Charming and I work on limited time. We've worked hard, very hard, to ensure our guests remember the experience at our wedding. The emotions of the day. The joy that we share. That they get a true glimpse into our reality.

When the green eyed monster reared it's evil head into OUR situation, I found out that I am normal. Just plain normal.

I see it a million times with my Brides and I finally became that girl. With my couples, it's easy. I play defense. You will NOT contribute unnecessary stress to my brides. That scenario is easy. In my own life, not so much. I let people "get to me" and try to rationalize it when the truth is, people sometimes suck.

I can not offer much in the way of comfort, but wanted to let other Brides in similar situations know that with wedding planning, you find out who you're true supporters are. You find out who values you and who genuinely supports your relationship. It's a blessing and a curse. The good thing is, in the end, the only people left in the room will be the ones on your team. Rest assured.

I recently posted the phrase on facebook and today I've decided that like my good colleague Mark Kingsdorf, it's going up on my wall.

If you are IN a wedding and you are NOT the Bride or Groom, REALITY check: IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU. AT ALL.

87...

A PLANNER PLANS: I WANNA SEX YOU UP!

Totally inappropriate title, but the perfect way to introduce what I am anticipating will be one of the greatest pieces of our wedding experience, the music.

One of the most obvious passions that Mr. C and I share as a couple is our love for music. It’s always playing. We love a mix of old school r&b, soul, big band and a little bit of country. We’ve spent many of Sundays watching videos on YouTube of performances from some of the industry greats and belting out the lyrics as a team. We are dorks. Certifiable dorks.

It was three years ago that I first had the pleasure of speaking with Brian Lizzi. You know those people that it takes about 5 seconds of speaking to, to feel like you’ve known them forever? Brian is that guy.

I was doing vendor confirmations for the Fanelle Wedding and our conversation ended something like this:

Brian: "Have you ever heard our band play?”
Me: "No, I have not had the fortune".
Brian: "Well, I can promise you this. You will be angry with me at the end of the night".
Me-(Totally perplexed)"why"?
Brian: "Because our band is going to be so good, no one is going to want to go home".

Well, I took what Brian said with a grain of salt because, well you know, all vendors try to sell to the wedding planner/ It’s just what they do. True to his word, the end of the magnificent night came and went and after four straight hours of watching approximately 200 people up and at it all night, I was impressed. I was also sold. That would be my wedding band.

Fast forward a few years later. Shortly after we booked the venue I had a candid conversation with Mr. Charming. Of course, this one was going to be a bit more difficult. You see, when you date a wedding planner, there are some things you pick up by nature. One of which most people would assume. A band is WAY more expensive than the average dj. To make matters worse, a phenomenal band…is double that. My first attempt at the band conversation was pretty much a bust. Not only did Mr. Charming want a dj, his high school friend is a well known professional dj that has been on the radio and doing celebrity events for years. After failing miserably at that conversation, I decided to change my approach. I asked Mr. Charming if he would go with me to a complimentary showcase, followed by a lunch date with yours truly. He couldn’t resist. We head out to our planned excursion and low and behold... traffic. Traffic=late arrival. No sweat I thought, there is no way they will go on first. There are seven acts. We get in and wouldn’t you know it, there is my band, doing their last song of the set.

EPIC FAIL.

Since we were already there, we agreed to just stay and listening to the other bands that CTO had to offer. Mr. Charming had a great time, we sang along, we took notes, it was awesome. He still hadn’t heard MY band though. True to form, Brian came over at the end of the set and introduced himself to Mr. Charming. I explained to him that we missed the band and he introduced us to Carmen, the owner. Carmen and Brian then escorted us to the private listening room where we watched the band’s latest performance on the big screen. Mr. Charming was sold.

In 98 days I will get to hear my favorite band in my favorite room with my favorite people and my better half and I’m bursting with excitement. Yes, the expense is astronomical in comparison, but like anything else, when looking at your budget, you must prioritize, and we did. We’re pretty sure there will not be any “I wanna sex you up” playing on our big day, but I know that Brian will keep his promise to me, a promise he made three years ago, to give the guests an experience they will never forget.

Without further ado, our band, CTO 5th Ave

98…

A Planner Plans: Stand by me

Will you be my At the alter and thru the craziness of wedding planning, friend, confidant and by my side girl? AKA bridesmaid?

Those were the words that began the email which I sent to the nine wonderful women that will stand beside me. Yes, you read correctly N-I-N-E.

I tried for the longest time to come up with a cute way to ask my bridesmaids to be a part of our wedding party and it was a major fail. I know these ladies. We've grown up together, laughed together, cried together and there was no card (hand made or store bought) that would ever be able to express how fortunate I feel to know them all. I used to host an annual girl's night out and invite all the girls to come into New York, stay at a hotel my treat, and go out for a night on the time. They are those type of friends.

Four of the nine I've known my entire life. We are family. I have one sister but was raised amongst many first cousins, close in age, close enough to feel more like sisters. I've known 2 of the remaining five girls for 20+ years and 1 for 18+. These women have been my very best friends for as long as I can remember. The next of the ladies, I proudly stood beside as her Maid of Honor one week from today. We met in college but quickly became the best of friends. Mr. Charming's sister rounds out the ninth addition of the group.

My posse roles deep! (Sorry I couldn't resist).

I quickly realized that I became the Bride I advise my clients not to be. To be honest, it's partially Mr. Charming's fault. Remember I mentioned he was an athlete? Well his friendships span 30 years and he was inviting EVERYONE to be a part of our day. Then reality struck. Large bridal party=Large expense and contrary to what I'd like to believe, we are not made out of money.

There would need to be some tweaking.

We decided (ok, I decided)early on in the planning process that we will not get married at the foot of a traditional aisle. This union is about our family and we want them to play a very active role in the entire event. Instead, we will either get married "in the round" or in a square configuration, surrounded by the people we love the most. My major concern with our large group, (we are at 20 including us) is that having 25% of the attending population, standing in a tiny space would look utterly ridiculous. But being in the wedding party they will obviously walk down, because that's just what you do.

Our compromise? Everyone will enter (my fab girls escorted by the groomsmen) and at the "foot" of the aisle separate and go to their seats. They will stand remain standing until I enter and be seated with the rest of the guests. Dilemma 1 solved.

Example of ceremony seating courtesy of my friend and colleague Juliet of Green Orchid Events




Issue #2. Floral costs. So.... 9 girls + 2 mothers + 9 groomsmen + 2 father figures + 2 ushers= ALOT of flowers. I always knew that I was not totally wowed by the idea of bridesmaids bouquets. Don't get me wrong they are lovely, but nothing hurts my heart more than setting them aside shortly after I remove them from the girls lined up during my couple's first dance, to go keep the cake company. I just knew I could not do it. I haven't exactly figured out if I will be substituting another object in the absence of the florals,I'm considering these fluerette cocktail rings (picture below) but for the time being, I have total faith in my ladies being able to keep their hands occupied during the ceremony. I've never understood the logic anyway. Dilemma #2 solved.

Fluerette Rings


Issue #3. Rehearsal Dinner. 30 people. Need I say more? Luckily Mama Charming has graciously offered to take care of this and we happily accepted. Dilemma #199 solved.

And because I would never tease you and end a post without atleast showing you what the girls will be strutting in...here you go.



(Jim Hjelm Couture Alvina Valenta)

A Planner Plans: Get over yourself

These are the words that little voice in my head has played over and over and over again.

I design for a living. We plan events but we design desires. I have studied how to cultivate a vision into a day that is cohesive and "pretty". We're taught to soothe the senses with every event. So when it's your own the pressure is turned beyond high to produce.

The reality however, is this is not a production. It's our wedding. It's not a show stopping, must see, scalp tickets to type of event. If we didn't have all the "pretty" the emotion and the general feel of the day SHOULD remain the same. I have to remind myself of that on a daily basis. Some days are easier than others.

I want all the lovelies. I want to break out all the newness in my industry so my guests jaws will hit the floor. The truth is they are going to be awed regardless, because our wedding will not be like any they have seen. Breaking the bank won't make that any more or less true.

So, I have a deal with Mr. Charming. Our wedding our way. If something does not seem "authentic" to who we are, we pass no matter how tempting. This was the most ingenious idea EVER. I so wish I came up with it myself.

Once I realized I needed to get over "myself" and who I felt the industry dictates I as a bride needed to be, the wheels began to turn.

With a little assistance from my amazing colleague and friend, LeTrice Penn of LePenn Designs we were able to develop a "theme" for the wedding. I use the word "theme" very loosely as we are not doing matchy matchy in the least. Just like I tell my clients, I encourage couples to develop a theme so that they stay on track when the planning wheels go astray. For POSH clients, we've used themes that span the length of the spectrum, with my favorite being "texture". Our theme will be "The Tale of Two Cities".

When we sat down to figure out what it was that Mr. Charming and I had a passion for (besides each other of course) what kept popping in our minds were our birthplaces. I am a Die.Hard. New yorker. I breathe congestion and confusion, chaos and hustle and bustle. I love the bright lights, dollar cabs and a good meal at 1:00am. I understand a sandwich is a "hero" not a hoagie and live for clubbing on a weekday. Mr. Charming on the other hand is a total Philadelphian, bless his heart.

When trying to decide on a theme and feeling desperate for options, Le'Trice suggested that we bring in what we love the best. We will be incorporating touches of both cities throughout the reception and the ceremony, while trying not to suffocate people with too much of a good thing.

Our guests first clue to our theme would be the introduction to our event or the save the date.

(LePenn Designs)


The Philadelphia half of the equation was easy to incorporate. We are getting married here and you better believe a cheesesteak, a pretzel and a great cream soda will make an appearance at somepoint during the day.

The New York portion was going to take a little work.

We met up with our phenominal photographers Matt & Angie of Entwined Studios. I seriously love them. Seriously. We scheduled our engagement session in the dead of winter because, #1, there's nothing like New York in the winter and since we're having the wedding in Philadelphia, we had to mirror the season in my home. Number 2, snow+cold= a great excuse for a pair of jeans, lots of snuggling and my beloved Uggs. Here are a few shots from the day:







Awesome right?!

I've also purchased items from some pretty amazing etsy sellers that will be used for decor. I would tell you exactly what for, but my guests read as well so it will have to stay a surprise!

Etsy seller: PullingPetals


Etsy seller: HuntersHideaway


Etsy seller: paperfinger



I've learned alot since embarking on this crazy journey (amidst the busiest wedding season we've ever had). I learned that sometimes, you really just have to get over yourself and out of your way to make it all come together. As Whitley Gilbert would say "relax, relate, release"...and you will be ok.

A Planner Plans: Decisions, Decisions

My mother is one of nineteen. My father, the youngest of 5. I easily have 50+ first cousins, 10 of which I spent almost everyday around. My parents love to entertain, (I'm pretty sure that's where my event gene was cultivated). Mr. Charming was an athlete the majority of his life, so is his brother. We are social butterflies times 10.

Slight problem.

My venue, after the inclusion of our 7 piece band and their massive stage, holds 120 MAX. Yes, that's right. One hundred twenty people.

We had a few options, the larger ballroom which was also available that evening, will hold upwards of 600. I've actually assisted with a wedding there with just around that guest count. It was huge! While the space is tempting, having a room that can accommodate 600 people would cause quite the problem. Why? Well, Daddy Petrie is the entertainer of all entertainers. He LOVES to invite people over. Remember the episode of the Cosby show where Theo graduated and Mr. Cosby brought lawn chairs? THAT.IS.MY.LIFE. So, as tempting as it would have been, I knew that opening those gates was one route we would not take. So, smaller ballroom it was.

When Mr. Charming and I first discussed this option we both laughed because the thought of only having 120 people (remember 50+adult first cousins for myself alone)was ludicrous. I've hosted barbeque's with almost that many people. But our wedding is no bbq and we refuse to become the "free" entertainment option for new years eve.

There had to be rules. Tight rules.

So here's how we cut our list (future brides and groom's take note).

1. If we didn't not know your real first & last name and only referred to you by a childhood nickname, you didn't make the cut.
2. If we hadn't seen you physically in 2 years, you didn't make the cut.
3. Adults were only allowed to bring dates if they were married or engaged (exceptions not even for the bridal party as these are people we've known atleast 20 years..more on that to come).
4.No children, or tweens. As a matter of fact, we restricted the age limit to 21 years or older. Even though 70% of our guests are from out of town, we felt our wedding just wasn't child friendly, and retained the services of the Wedding Sitters to watch the littles ones.

With these rules in hand for us, we gave each set of parents 15 invites each and split the remaining 90 (ok I took 50) between us two.

Mission accomplished.

When we first set out on this task, it seemed really far fetched. How do you not offend your great aunt twice removed? Your co-worker from 10 years ago? Your tweeps (twitter peeps) or the 2000 facebook fans who are so excited for your planning? You stay focused. We realized that if we wouldn't normally invite you to a $130 dinner, our wedding was certainly not the time to start-that logic helped alot.

This was the first of many, many difficult decisions to come and we made it through. Alive. A little bruised (not all of our guests were delighted with our choices) but together.

And just in case you forgot internet, this one is for you dad!



Have a great holiday weekend!

A Planner Plans: The Venue

Picking a venue was one of the easiest decisions in the planning process thus far. Shortly after "I will" and realizing we were not leaving the states, I knew the location.

Last Memorial Day weekend I had the honor of planning the wedding of Jennifer & Colby . As I stood in the room and watched the couple do their first dance as husband and wife, I whispered to my Assistants "If I ever get married, this is where it will be". Fast forward 19 months from that date and that wish will come true.

As a planner, you're exposed to so many phenominal venues in the area. From large to small, extravagent to modern and chic. You know the ins and outs of every single location down to the state of the restrooms. How's a girl to choose?

The feel we are going for with our wedding is more relaxed, more contemporary and more us. I am by no means a traditional bride and I definitely struggle with incorporating the traditional elements with a more modern twist, as do many of my couples. The Hyatt offers the perfect compromise for a chic and convenient location accessible to many of our guests, 70% who will be travelling for the event.

More than anything, I want our wedding to be honest. An honest reflection of our love. Honest reflection of our committment and an honest portrayal of who we are as individuals and who we aspire to be as a couple. I enjoy understated sophistication. I love anything from bcbg, a good pair of jeans and a comfy pair of uggs. Mr. Charming is definitely laid back. He's an athlete by nature and just a very genuine "good guy". Stuffy is not us, neither is overstated and over the top.



This is the actual ballroom where our wedding ceremony and reception will take place. I can't WAIT to incorporate POSH "touches" in the space!


Views


Stations


Ballroom


Its Pefect.

The ever so talented Tim Sudall of Video One Productions put together a video of some weddings at our venue, feast your eyes on this:

Hyatt Regency Penns Landing Philadelphia by Tim Sudall Video One Productions from Video One - Tim Sudall on Vimeo.

Riverfront hotel, amazing food (more on that to come), and a view of the most spectacular fireworks show in the city-yes please!

A planner plans: Weathering the storm

I interrupt our regurlarly scheduled update to bring you a dose of reality. My reality.

Over the last 18 months, I've experienced the death of 6 loved ones. My mother has lost 3 sisters, 1 brother in law, a nephew and a cousin. My grandmother experienced 2 strokes and my father was diagnosed with a brain tumor.

IT.HAS.NOT.BEEN.EASY.

With the length of most engagements averaging a year+, it is quite common to experience a tragedy of some sort. All of a sudden what seemed like the happiest time in your life is cut short and replaced by tears and sorrow. You know that the wedding is approaching but somehow things just don't seem the same.

I share this sentiment with many of my couples currently planning.

What I often advise is to find a special way to still include that individual in your day. By special, I mean personal. The popular options are a memorial table, a memorial candle and a note in the program but the act does not have to be one of outward expression. For some this does not work however. Simply carrying a token representing this person on your bouquet, including their favorite flower in your centerpieces or sharing a quiet moment with your fiance during the day to acknowledge their spirit, are also options to consider.

While it saddens me to know I will not get to share the day with people that have contributed to who I am as an individual, that I won't dance with my uncle as we often did, or laugh with my favorite aunt, I am reminded that we will celebrate with a room full of people that love and support us and that the memory of those not present physically is still very present in our hearts.

We have chosen to hang 8 butterflies from the ceiling during the ceremony representing each individual we hold dear to us and the evolution of their life. We are not making an announcement to their significance nor are we looking to sadden the mood of such a joyous occasion. To those in attendance it will look like another beautiful decor item, to us however, they represent our loved ones looking over us as we recite lifelong promises to one another and to me it really helps. Alot.

What have you done/are you doing to remember those who will not be in attendance on your big day?

A Planner Plans: The Countdown

One Hundred Forty Days.

It glared at me. THE countdown courtesy of project wedding that popped up this morning when I looked at my cell phone.

I looked again, it couldn't be. 140 days? What happened to the other 225? Seems like you blink and the year of planning is summarized into an incredible 8 hour day that you'll never forget.

As our date approaches, I must admit, I get to be pretty antsy. As my planner friend Lakendra Kennedy would say, "Isis, you're a planner first!". These 4 words have kept me from the deep end many of times. The reality is, I've been a planner way longer than I've been a contender for the wife spot. I SHOULD know better; I SHOULD prioritize better. THIS SHOULD BE EASY.

The greater reality, I'm human.

My clients, past and present have been so incredibly supportive of the engagement. Many of my brides ask "is it any easier?" and I tell them...not hardly. When you're a Vendor getting married, you face an entirely different set of stresses. Managing budgets with vendor relationships, not wanting to offend anyone, expectations of your colleagues, your guests and what you think you should be able to provide in terms of experience.

The double whammy is having it on New Year's eve. Big date=BIGGER expectations. Mr. Charming does not drink alcohol. Any other date for our wedding and we would have been skating on a dry reception possibly beer/wine (which I think is a great option by the way), but noo...someone had to have the grand idea to throw a grand party on a grand day, usually associated with lots of alcohol. So, open bar it is because after all, what kind of new year's party is it without a little bubbly (or so i've been reminded)?

One Hundred Forty Days. One Hundred twenty guests. One seven peice band. 2 photographers. 3 videographers. 1 florist. 2 lighting technicians. 1 invitation designer. 4 graphic designers. 2 linen companies. 2 rental companies. 19 bridal party members.

1 million more decisions over the next 3,350 hours.

Overwhelming? A little.

I reminded myself that at the end of the day, the truth is, this is really about 1 girl, loving 1 boy and the blessings and prayers of the family and friends surrounding them. It's about 1 unit. What doesn't take place, will never be missed. What doesn't go smoothly, will be rejoiced regardless. This one moment has taken a lifetime to get to. One hundred forty more days...I can handle it.

A Planner Plans: The Date

The date of an event is so critical in determining the style, location, and overall type of event you will be having. For us,the decision was one of the easiest we've had thus far.

The conversation went a little like this...

Me: "Honey, have you thought about when you want to get married?"
Mr. Charming "We can do it whenever you like..."
Me: "Well, if we do destination..."
Mr. Charming: (with a look of total confusion) "We can't do destination, I want to make sure that the people closest to me attend. I'm thinking Philadelphia".
Me: (slightly saddened): Well, if we do it locally, it has to be in the winter. I currently have weddings until October 23rd and need atleast 1-2 months to focus on ours. That puts us in December."
Mr Charming: "A December wedding? With the holidays. I don't know..."
Me: "Not just a December wedding, a New Year's Eve wedding".
Mr. Charming: (Not totally convinced) "New Year's Eve?"
Me: "Yes sweetie, it's perfect. Exactly one year from the date you proposed, we will get to celebrate the biggest day of the year surrounded by all those we love. EEEEEK!"
Mr. Charming (cracking a smile): "Sounds good to me!"

And there you have it ladies and gentleman. The 60 second exchange which took place to decide on our date. We're very fortunate to have a solid booking and amazing wedding season spanning from January-November at POSH this year and I know that I had to give my current Clients 100% of me to avoid feeling guilt during my own personal planning process.

Mr. Charming and I love the holidays. Between November-December 31st, we celebrate 8 family birthdays (including his and mine), Thanksgiving and Christmas. We both have strong ties to our families and feel fortunate to have fostered friendships in excess of 20 years that are now extended family. We recognize that a holiday wedding isn't ideal for all. To add to the mix, NYE falls on a Friday this year and we're having an evening ceremony and adult only reception.

While it may not be convenient for all of our guests, we hope that those that are able to attend experience a magical night, witnessing the love we share for each other and for them. It's like I always tell my couples, the goal of a great wedding is for your guests to walk away feeling like they've learned a little more about your relationship. The foundation of our relationship is faith, family and friends. Celebrating on one of the biggest holidays of the year, is an added bonus.

Besides, when you are guaranteed a view like this, how could you resist?

A Planner Plans

It's been seven months since I first embarked on my own engagement journey, and let me tell you, sitting on both sides of planning table is interesting to say the least. I find myself sharing many of the same emotions as my couples-excited, nervous, anxious and at times how shall I say..."extra". I can truly empathize now the need to go above and beyond for what you are constantly reminded of as the biggest day of your life.

Nevertheless, my fiance "Mr. Charming" and I agreed that this day is about us. Not posing for the camera, pretending for the crowd, or doing anything that even remotely felt artificial. Instead, we are planning an initimate reception for our closest family and friends on the biggest celebration day of the year (New year's eve) in one of the greatest cities in the world.

It's been such an interesting ride, I'm excited to share the details with you all.

A planner plans. No pressure...(wink)